Alex Dave, Safeguarding Education Officer at ed-tech charity, LGfL-the National Grid for Learning, shares advice on building positive partnerships with parents, and ways Designated Safeguarding Leads (DSLs) can approach difficult conversations.
‘Working collaboratively will mean parents and carers have the best chance of making changes, and practitioners can make fair and accurate decisions about how to support children and keep them safe.’ Department for Education (DfE) Working Together to Safeguard Children (Dec 2023)
Parents and carers have the greatest influence on children’s outcomes, so in order to safeguard children, it’s important to find ways to work effectively with them. Developing and maintaining relationships can be challenging at the best of times. As a DSL, some of the most difficult conversations often involve families, so it’s surprising how little time, training, and support, is typically allocated to developing this vital aspect of a DSLs role.
Through Relational Practice, we offer recognition and respect to parents and honour their autonomy, expertise and experiences, working with and empowering them to focus on their strengths and outcomes, thereby enhancing the safety and wellbeing of their children.
While the likely focus on relational practice in school is with children, it’s equally vital to nurture relationships with parents and carers. Consider your current practice:
- What do your relationships with parents currently look like?
- How do parents describe these?
- Who do you struggle to engage with and why?
- What regular and ongoing opportunities do you create for all parents to be involved with, get to know and communicate with the school?
Look at the points below and consider, to what extent do you adopt these, and what evidence do you have that this is the case?
Empathy and understanding – approach all families with empathy, unconditional positive regard and creativity, acknowledging families’ unique circumstances and needs.
Avoid ‘othering’ – focus on finding similarities between yourself and parents to create more authentic and empathic connections.
Avoid reinforcing shame and blame – parents will be doing what they can within the confines of their own resources, motivation and capacity. Working collaboratively allows them to feel seen, heard and understood, and when this happens, they are much more likely to positively engage.
Use strengths-based approaches – identify and build on family strengths to effect positive change in other areas. For example, where a child is coming to school late 60% of the time, find out what happens on the days when they arrive on time, and what can be learned and transferred from these situations.
Understand families’ contexts – families may exist within complex webs of trauma and adversity such as poverty, trauma or bereavement. To help improve outcomes for children, acknowledge these with compassion, to foster trust and build positive relationships.
Know your parents – parents are diverse groups with varying needs. Consider barriers such as mobility issues, language barriers, cultural norms, or environmental differences, to ensure that all parents feel included.
Avoid bias and stereotypes – unfair judgements – whether conscious or unconscious – can harm relationships. Sometimes staff can be very judgemental about parents. Uphold your school values with all members of the school community by ensuring all are treated with respect and fairness.
Collaborate and work with parents – shift from ‘doing safeguarding to’ parents, to ‘working collaboratively’ with them. Build trust by listening and helping families find solutions that meet their unique needs.
None of this is at odds to or should distract from the utmost important principle in safeguarding: that the child’s welfare is paramount. Any concerns staff have, that harm is being caused or is likely to be caused to a child by abuse, neglect or exploitation, must be responded to immediately as per the school’s safeguarding policy and procedures. However, you can still challenge concerns through empathy, respect, and non-judgmental dialogue to positively impact your relationships with parents, and ultimately outcomes for children.
For more information and free training, please visit https://lgfl.net/Safeguarding/Relational-Practice
